Just wanted to ask how’s everyone been doing
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I’m doing good. Finally have a painted army and I get to work in a lab I like, so mucho happy
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Thanks for asking big bobo. I can’t talk about this anywhere - it’s ROUGH!! Police have been to the house multiple times because of on-going problems with one of our teens. I’ve been in tears on the phone with the crisis help line trying to find out what our options are but there aren’t really any if the teen is unwilling so we’re stuck waiting until things escalate and the justice system really gets involved or our kid decides to change on their own. Wife and I have both had to flee the house at separate times so things can’t escalate physically and so we don’t have to be witness to the on-going property destruction. New heated kitchen floor with massive imported tiles will be easily $30K we don’t have. We also have deadbolt locks on most interior doors in the house now.
Separately, my wife and I restructured her business last year and in theory we saved money (on paper) but I had a tax payment last month that was more than I made in after-tax take home pay (I work full time in the Dept. of Surgery, so it was A LOT).
On top of all of this my wife and I serve as Board of Director members for a youth sports league that’s been broke for years and we can never get ahead - constantly doing fund raising and always late with cheques… I had my suspicions for 18+ months, since shortly after I joined in 2022 and it was recently confirmed that our treasurer has mismanaged funds for at least the last 3 years. Mismanaged is generous. They were treasurer since 2019 at least (nobody is sure because this person was the longest serving member and has hidden records and obfuscated things to the point that it’s been hard to track what’s happening). All told, just since 2021 it’s well up in the 5 figures that we can prove from bank records where it went (the sports league didn’t spend it, hint hint) and if found guilty easily crosses the threshold of grand theft here, which often carries jail time. The local and national news here typically reports on theft and embezzlement of this magnitude, so at this point we’re trying to figure out how to keep the league running for the sake of the kids with no money and are constantly in damage control. Oh, and this former board member couldn’t reconcile the corporate finances so they quietly registered the league under a new business name which can be abbreviated with the same acronym so that they could continue the deception after last year. It’s so much more money than I could have ever imagined a youth sports league would have had. We could have had money for our other athletes to travel to other cities, money for parties, new equipment. Hell, none of the coaches have been compensated at all in several years. VERY unfortunately I swore a declaration to the city and to our provincial lottery commission that the financial statements I presented to them last year were factual and correct and we won all the grants we went after. Now that we’re no longer a non-profit, have a different business name, are locked out of our bank accounts, and I misreported our finances we’re at risk of having all the money raked back. OH, and we just found out that the treasurer, who also used to run all the fundraising, did not pay the companies we were selling products for, they ordered way more stuff under our league’s name (probably to re-sell on their own) and the funds the parents and kids raised were supposed to go toward their fees for next session except that none of that money came in, so we have a few dollars in a bank account we’re locked out of, owe over $2800 to a company we did a fundraiser with, and also technically owe money to most of the athletes families, which means many of them will not have to pay their full fees, so we may not have enough money during Fall 2024 intake to even pay for our facility.
Other than that things are good. Wife and I are hanging in. Almost 17 years married (this coming weekend) and we’ll have been together 20 yrs this September. With all this happening though neither of us have been feeling very crafty or creative. There’s been a lot of sitting around in a stupor. At least we’re doing it together.
How’s everyone else?
~N
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Dear Nico,
first of all I’m really glad you shared this with us! Life is fucking hard and you have been dealt a particularly hard blow. I often find that sharing something like this in one of these semi-anonymous online groups is easier, even though I can hardly compensate a “real” shoulder to lean on. But sometimes getting it all off your chest is such a healthy step to take, and the knowledge that somewhere on this rock there’s someone who heard you and is thinking about you sometimes can be comforting.
Unfortunately I cannot offer any tangible advice on any of those subjects, but I heard you my friend and I’m here for you to listen.
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Christ alive @Nicodemus - an annus horribilis.
Glad you’ve been able to offload here. Jasko is right. Semi anonymity of forum life allows you to make friends etc but also offload to folk who don’t like, live down the road.
Look after yourself mate. Blokes need to keep an eye on that sort of thing. We can bottle up.
Congrats on being married 17 years! Quite the achievement.
I’d have managed that, if I could stay married long enough 
Maybe by the end of my life I’ll have 17 years combined? 
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And answer to your question @bigbobo life is busy but generally well.
Fractured my elbow last week at a stag do in Germany.
I blame the idiot who forced me to drink all that beer, who made me fall over on a cobblestone street and still convinced me to do the Macarena on a table afterwards.
That idiot is me
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Thank you nic for telling us about it what happened. I know I may not be able to offer much to ya but I wish you the best of luck with the club and in life in these trying times for you
Sincerely bo (wish I could give ya a big ole hug man)
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Lul okay hope your elbow is better man
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Hell fucking ya man enjoy the lab
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Gotrek and crabby mc crab face
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HAHA My exact 2 picks also. Your lab is not owned by Umbrella Corporation I hope.
Those crab zombies will be a bit<?..
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Oh brother… that sounds really horrible. It sounds like its too much for one person to handle, so im at least happy to hear you and the mrs have eachother.
Financial issues are always stressful, and it sounds like youre surely in a pickle. And the kids being troublesome…
I can only echo what the others said, youre welcome to offload here, please dont keep this inside!
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Malus Dark-pincer 
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Ohha Nicodemus
I’m sorry to hear that you’re having such problems with your child. It’s hard when you have to go through it alone and the only solution is escalation and therefore the worst case scenario or the farthest point of realisation.
The thing with the club also really sucks and I can’t even begin to empathise with your situation.
My thoughts are with you and your wife, I hope our sympathy helps you.
And then I’ve just thought about my situation again…
I’m fine.
I think I’ve just got over the worst of it, my wife is doing well so far, the dog is running around and I have enough work here to keep me busy, but not too much to get me down. My working life is such that I don’t really have anything to complain about. And so I can only say, thanks for asking, I’m fine.
I hope that you can all sit back and say that soon too
Translated with DeepL.com (free version)
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Thanks everyone. I really appreciate everyone here, it means a lot!! This is a fantastic community and I’m quite grateful for all the hobby enjoyment everyone continues to contribute.
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Hello Nico!
Sorry that I’m only now getting back to you, but real life has hit me too. I have a lot more work than I can cope with at the moment, my 91 year old father is in hospital again and I have massively debilitating back pain. All this before the first vacation in (I think) 8 years and the first vacation with my wife without the kids.
And the old man must be falling, breaking ribs and barely able to walk. I now have to take care of the rest before the vacation, my brother lives a good 500 km away near Berlin and has no idea about all these things either.
But of course none of these problems are anywhere near as bad and frustrating as your problems with your child. My son is a strange, almost shy nerd, but he is very friendly and helpful, albeit strange. What happens in your youth league is also more than frustrating. you wouldn’t wish all these problems on your worst enemy. Even though I live in Europe, if there is anything I can help you with, please let me know.
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Look after yourself and your family Zanko!! From experience - aging parents in declining health can be mentally exhausting and such a worry.
I sincerely hope you and your wife can make it on your vacation without any complications (aside from back pain… yikes). My wife and I are fantasizing regularly about getting away on some trips without the kids in a few years. A good month+ in Scotland and some of the outer islands, with a goodly portion of the Isle of Skye… a cycling tour through Japan, possibly a return trip to northern India, etc. LOL, all the stuff we’d enjoy more without listening to kids complaining the whole time, haha!!
~N
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Dear Zanko,
fingers crossed for you that everything works out. I know quite well how hard it is to balance caring for a parent with personal well-being. And it sounds like you really need that vacation! But often life has different plans for us. I hope you can arrange the appropriate care for your father while you would be away. And then take care of yourself! You’re no help for your father either if you can’t function properly.
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Alright thanks guys for telling me how you guys have been doing recently and the things that have been happening for you guys good to talk to you guys again apolgiesbi don’t keep up with the forum much at times
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