[Archive] (non warhammer)� � GWAR vs Squad Myrmidon: Warengine rules


Battle Report: Gwar vs Myrmidon Mercenaries

For those of you not familiar, we used the warengine rules, details found here:


It is a fun, fast system, that allows for the creation of forces from any line of creature/figure you can imagine.  The force creation tools are simple yet solid.  We ran into a slight problem playing though, as we were working from two separate versions of the engine, I used the Gwar Rumble in Antarctica version 1999, and my opponent used Shockforce v2 from 2000.  The main difference is in Hero Points, how they are allocated and used in the game.  We decided for the first game to use the systems as written for our opposing forces, and then for game two my force was modified, Hero Points reduced, and spread across my army.  Somewhere in the middle of game two we realized that the Hero Points were further limited by the number of points used in creating a force, so the next time we play we should both be using legal forces created using the same system.  The creators of the game are also working on an updated v3 of the game that should be released soon.

For this battle report, as it was our first one playing with this system, we choose a smaller sized force: 500 points of renown, 1000 points of force. (I had played Shockforce before - but years ago - so for all intents and purposes it was my first game again)

I chose a GWAR heavy force consisting of: 2 characters, Cardinal Syn and Slymenstra Hymen, 2 Heavy Monsters, Gor-Gor and The World Maggot, �?oRobo Pimp�?� and his four skanks, and a Slave of Slymenstra with 6 lowly slaves with two veteran slaves.

Cardinal Syn

Slymenstra and her Slaves:

Robo Pimp and the Skanks:

The World Maggot:


My opponent chose an armored fighting force consisting of: 2 characters, Achilles (Blood Angels�?T Character) and Ajax (Dark Angels�?T Jump Pack Marine), a Heavy Gunship Vehicle (Star Wars Imperial Shuttle) and a squad of mercenaries.

The story�?�

Cardinal Syn had decided that it was time to purge Earth of decadence and had convinced a disoriented Slymenstra to assist him in engulfing the globe in the cleansing flames of ultimate purification.  Together they begin to gather a force to recon with by stealing some slaves and prostitutes from the slumbering members of GWAR as they slept off major hangovers from an all night binge of reckless consumption from the night before.  Their exploits at the beginning were horrific, whole towns razed in the name of the Great Holy Robot.  As the Plague of Cardinal Syn spread, word of his coming roused a mercenary squad �?" The Myrmidons �?" to action.  Jumping aboard the gunship, the interdictor, they flew toward the onrushing forces of Cardinal Syn just as they emerged from some mountainous terrain between villages�?�

The World Maggot emerges from a tunnel behind the Myrmidon front

Turn 1

Team Myrmidon wins initiative and the squad of foot-soldiers moves first, his sniper taking a quick shot at my distant slaves.  The range proved too great for his sonic weapon and the blast fizzed out in the intervening space, receding to a mere whisper as it blew back the hair on the confused slave�?Ts head.  The rest of the squad turns to the more immediate threat of The World Maggot who had just erupted from the ground nearby.  They bombard the undulating creature with wave after wave of sonic blasts in a massed attack and it explodes into a putrescent volcano of pungent slime.  The Slaves charge forward into the trees, moving toward squad myrmidon in the distance running full force into a barrage of turret fire from the hovering gunship that had flown to the center of the battlefield.  

Enraged, Slymenstra attempts to retaliate, moving forward and belching a ball of fire at the flying hulk of metal �?" its shiny metal plates easily absorb the heat.  The Myrmidon force leader activates his jet pack, flying to the top of the mountain and blasts his sonic weapon at the Hulking Gor-Gor, the only effect was to antagonize the beast into charging forward and scream at him from the base of the mountain.  Ajax, the other Squad Myrmidon captain runs forward, takes a shot at slymenstra as she shakes her fist at the hovering gunship, and the jump packs into some distant trees.  Cardinal Syn climbs the mountain directly in front of him and unfurls a blast of devotion at the gunship which is simply reflected off of its hull.  He then pronounces final judgment on Achilles, which proves not so final, as Achilles passes the mental attack and retains his soul intact.  Finally, Robo Pimp and his skanks move into position on the hill to take shots at Achilles, but all miss horribly.  The slaves remarkably decide not to route and attempt to continue their headlong charge through the woods.

Turn 2

Cardinal Syn�?Ts forces rally with initiative and the Great Holy Robot explodes with another Blast of Devotion at the gunship, penetrating its hull this time, but only reducing it by 2 hero points.  Once again he pronounces final judgment on Achilles, but Achilles just laughs it off.  Cardinal Syn, now extremely pissed off at being denied another soul to consume, he charges into close combat and hits Achilles with a fist of redemption, knocking him around a bit, and then flattening him with a stomp of penitence, killing him.  

The Gunship opens up with all of its weapons, wiping out the rest of the slaves, eliminating Robo Pimp and three of the skanks, incinerating Slymenstra with its afterburner attack and denting the Cardinal Syn�?Ts metallic carapace with a turret blast.  Gor-Gor continues to charge forward, directly into the waiting myrmidons.  He immediately consumes one of them, eating it whole, then tearing and rending a second one into itty-bitty pieces, and finally roaring out a deafening blast, knocking one of the remaining soldiers to his feet, shaken, but not dead.  

The myrmidons go into action by turning and firing a massed attack at Gor-Gor, who easily shrugs it off.  The myrmidon leader courageously charges forward, directly into hand to hand combat with the lumbering beast, succeeding in bringing him down with a sonically vibrating blade.  The myrmidon sniper takes a shot at the now flaming Slymenstra as she recovers from the gunship attack, but it goes wide, and she remains unharmed.  Slymenstra howls with fury and charges at the myrmidons, unleashing a burst of flame that turns one more soldier into a smoldering pile of armor shells.  Captain Ajax uses his jump pack to fly to the center of the mountain to avenge Achilles�?T death.  Ajax lands and immediately charges into close combat with a vengeance.  After two swings from his mighty hammer, the now dented and mangled Holy Robot topples down the cliff face, banging his head on every outcropping as he falls, culminating in a great holy explosion as he impacts the ground, his reign of terror at an end.  

With Robo Pimp dead, the remaining skank immediately turns and runs from the battle in search of a nice safe corner from which she may make a few dollars for a return trip to the GWAR fortress in Antarctica.  Squad myrmidon, resolve hardening, lower their visors in determination as Slymenstra barrels down at them.

Turn 3

Slymenstra wins initiative, running toward the crouching sniper, flail swinging about her, in her haste she overextends, misses badly, and dejectedly slips away to a shallow cove in the mountain, from which she unleashes another fire ball, but this time the heavy rock formations lend enough benefit to the remaining soldiers to prevent all damage.  Squad myrmidon retaliates with a symphony of sonic blasts and exploding grenades and the final disciple of Syn falls to her death.

Ajax summons the remaining soldiers to the top of the mountain and they victoriously fly off into the sunset, the pilot cranking Ride of the Valkyries on their custom installed surround sound system�?�

Thommy H:

This is literally the weirdest thing ever.


Lol… weirdest… as in the GWAR… or the game play? If you like Chaos but don’t know GWAR, then you should check this out:


GWAR is an American shockrock punk/metal band that started in the 80’s, very theatrical in their performances… killing people, spraying the crowd with “blood” and “mucus” and various other fluids…

Here are two of their songs off of one of their latest albums:

metal metal land:


Lords and Masters


Thommy H:

I know who GAWR are. I just wasn’t aware of the possibility that someone might be motivated to collect and play a tabletop wargame with models in their likenesses.


Cardinal Syn and Slymenstra Hymen, 2 Heavy Monsters, Gor-Gor and The World Maggot, �?oRobo Pimp�?� and his four skanks, and a Slave of Slymenstra with 6 lowly slaves with two veteran slaves.
This is the best sentence ever :cheers


I know who GAWR are. I just wasn't aware of the possibility that someone might be motivated to collect and play a tabletop wargame with models in their likenesses.

Thommy H
Heck yeah man... I don't have them all painted up yet though.. too much metal sitting in too many boxes...

Baggronor: Yeah, the slaves really just provided moving cover... I was able to win the second game, and a few of the slaves even made it to the end!


I’ve been looking to check out the Warengine ruleset for a while now. Seeing you guys use all these different kinds of models is great! Would you say the ruleset is balanced?


I love the concept.

Will try to read the rules in a more complete way, and get my mates to give it a go.


Well, the warengine itself allows you to create pieces using a standard set of statistics. All players work from that standard set, but it is easy to create tweaks, edges and faults, name them what you want, and have a go. the game mechanics are simple, play is fast. the rules are available free at the dark tortoise site above…


thanks for that… interesting read


This was surprisingly interesting, and definitely not a bland battle report.

Cheers for letting us know about it, was very interesting as I knew near to nothing about Warengine before this.



The Warengine is currently undergoing a revision to that has added online tabbed unit builders, I have poked around a little, but it looks to be very promising. The game play is very smooth!