Willmark:
- Wait, that underwear consisting of less materiel then one of Kera’s eyepatches cost how much?
2. No shopping is not a sport.
3. What do you mean I cant answer Yes or No?
snowblizz:
x.) Did I forget to mention mother is coming to visit tomorrow? (works both ways even)
Hashut’s Blessing:
This was said by a friend that is a girl (bear in mind I am the epitome of dwarfocity): I can see you in drag, it’d really suit.
Swissdictator:
This was said by a friend that is a girl (bear in mind I am the epitome of dwarfocity): I can see you in drag, it'd really suit.Could be worse. A friend of mine's gf asked him if he *was* in drag.
Hashut's Blessing
Perturabo:
My ex-girlfrind once asked me if I was gay. I still don’t know why.
Kera foehunter:
here is the best one !! ftw
you can’t cut me off ! you don’t know where i’m getting it !!!
Swissdictator:
here is the best one !! ftwRum?
you can't cut me off ! you don't know where i'm getting it !!!!
Kera foehunter
Willmark:
“So I got you this exercise machine for your birthday…”
Kera foehunter:
well i never thought of it that way swiss
snowblizz:
here is the best one !! ftw:):):hat off:):)
you can't cut me off ! you don't know where i'm getting it !!!!
Kera foehunter
I have to give you a bow for creativity.
Is it just me or does this thread need to come with a disclaimer?
Surgeon general's warning: Use of this thread IRL will cause much hilarity, drawbacks can include loss of relationships and other adverse effects.
Hashut’s Blessing:
“I may have eaten the cat.”
AGPO:
17. Your sister was better.Bedroom rodeo for the win!!
Willmark
For the uninitated bedroom rodeo is a competitive sport which involves waiting until your partner is about to climax, screaming her sister/best friend's name and seeing how long you can stay on :hat off
"Um, my boyfriend is back from Peru on Saturday"
Me: "Do you mind! Who the f*** are you anyway?"
Irate looking bloke: "I'm her f***ing fiance!"
"And you're putting that where!?!"
"You may call it a sport, I call it homo erotic"
Her: "And you kiss your mother with that mouth?"
Me: "I kiss your mother with this mouth."
overheard in a local club: "It's not what I've got against Scottish women, its what I've got from Scottish women"
"So how do guys make them vibrate anyway?"
"I'm sorry I didn't realise we were exclusive"
"Yeah, my ex is still a bit jealous."
"Oh, you meant two girls..."
My mother: "I'm sure I know her from somewhere..." (My mum worked in a Sexual Health Clinic at the time)
A friend breaking up with his better half: "You're an incredible woman, just a terrible shag."
Baggronor:
AGPO you rock 
I once had a gay female friend tell me I’d look good in a skirt. I honestly don’t know what the appropriate response was, but she meant it as a compliment. I think
Kera foehunter:
Well lets see if she was right !!!
Picture please!!!
Baggronor:
Ain’t gonna happen
WarplockMonkey:
These are all supposed to be said by women btw…
1. ‘Honey…im not the girl you think i am’
2. ‘Ohhhh that stinks…sorry my bad’
3.‘You mean you would rather spend a day doing those stupid little models than take me shoppping?’
4.‘I did that when i was a lad’
5.’ I dont know how your wallet got in there, honest!’
6.‘When was the last time you showered?’
7. ‘It was fine when I left it’
8.‘Do you think this relationship is working?’
9.’ Yes but WHY do you love me?’
10. 'My dad is an Irish, 6 foot 7, 20 stone interrigator for the Navy. He calls me his ‘little princess’ and god knows what would happen if anyone hurt me… ’ (note, HAS been said to me before D:)
11. 'What are you doing in my underwear?!'
Ok ok ill stop now
- Warplock
Kera foehunter:
i like number 10
but more like kill than hurt
11 is kinda funny
zorn sabretooth:
1 “i’m a scientologist!”
2. “Well, at least we got there in the end”
3 “You spend more time listening to AC/DC then you do to me.”
“Darling, that’s because I love them more than you”
4 “Your performance was satisactory at best”
5 " I would have sex with you more if you weren’t so ugly"
Hammerhand:
My better half has said all theese to me, and we’re still together!
1. Don’t point that thing at me.
2. You have to help more around the house.
3. Please yourself, you always do.
4. No. I’ve done that with someone else and I didn’t like it.
5. Grow up!
6. Would you mind sleeping on the sofa, your snoring is pi$$ing me off and I would still be able to hear you from the spare room.
7. I threw out those trainers you ran the london marathon in, they smell.
8. You have too many models. No more armies until you finish one you’ve got.
9. I thought you wanted some screwdrivers for christmas.
10. Thanks for my christmas present but I don’t like it, I’m taking it back tomorrow to get something I actually want.
11. You drink too much.
12. you never listen (or something like that!)
13. Nothing is ever my fault because it is always your fault.
God I love her!!
Kera foehunter:
WOW Hammerhand i see she molded you into one of the best husband
btw you forgot to put the seat down in the bathroom!!!#14